“Our society trains people for every type of job — computer programming, hair dressing, law, teaching, medicine — every vocation, that is, except parenting, the most important of all.”
-Dr. Nina R. Lief, Prominent child psychiatrist, pediatrician, author and Former Director of the Early Childhood Development Center
Parenting is NOT Intuitive
Dr. Lief is right. The only training for most parents is a birthing class prior to the birth of the first born…and that’s for a one day event. Who trains us how to address everything we are going to face over the next 18 years for arguably the most important job we will ever have?
In a recent Newsweek column, Anna Quindlen asks, “Being a parent is easy and intuitive, correct? Well, no—it’s just customary to pretend that that’s the case.”
As parents, we feel pressure from family, friends, teachers, in-laws and society to raise well-behaved children. The problem is…someone forgot to explain this to our children.
So, how do you address a child throwing a tantrum in the middle of the grocery store or an eye-rolling teenager who isn’t listening? What do you do about a toddler who won’t go to bed at night? How should you handle children who are constantly fighting with each other or won’t do their homework? The solutions to these misbehaviors are anything but intuitive.
Positive Parenting Solutions Online will help you go from feeling frustrated and overwhelmed to feeling calm and confident.
3 Things You Should Know
1. You CAN correct the misbehaviors quickly and permanently! But, only if you address the root cause of the behavior. You need more than a Band-Aid on symptoms – you must understand what really motivates the misbehavior and have the concrete tools to address the root issue.
2. Misbehaviors are inter-related. I’ve never met a family who only had “tantrum” issues. They also have (or will have) issues with back-talk, not listening, helplessness, whining, sibling rivalry and other power struggles. All of these frustrating misbehaviors are related to a child’s hard-wired, instinctive need for power. The child WILL get his power.
If we don’t meet his basic human need for positive power, he will find his power through negative means and one power behavior will morph into another. Keep this in mind: “Doing nothing” won’t make the problem go away.
3. “Intuitive” approaches used by parents usually make the behaviors worse. Intuitive strategies like “Time Out”, punishments and trying to “control the situation” actually invoke the “fight or flight response” in children and cause the behaviors to continue and escalate. We teach you the step-by-step process to end the power struggles for good.
Stop wishing the misbehaviors away. Enroll today and get the tools you need to correct the misbehaviors permanently!