3 Adult Behaviors Guaranteed to Make Tantrums Continue

1. Reasoning with a child who’s in the midst of a tantrum. (i.e. Talking him down off the ledge) You’ve seen it (or perhaps done it yourself)…”It’s okay, sweetie, calm down, let me help you, let’s go play with your train, let’s get a drink of water, stop crying, calm down, etc.” A tantrum-throwing child is in a state of high-emotion and not in a position to rationally consider your suggestions. Further, the ongoing verbal feedback only reinforces the behavior and reassures the child that a tantrum is a very effective strategy to get attention!

2. Being firm and then giving in. Sometimes, we just can’t tolerate it any longer. The wailing, the thrashing, the unhappiness. While you “know” you should remain firm, sometimes parents just don’t have the stomach for an Oscar-winning tantrum and eventually give in. Unfortunately, this proves to the child that you’re not an easy nut to crack, but…you will eventually cave if she keeps the tantrum up longer and louder.

Persistence on her part is the key!

3. Adding fuel to the fire. A tantrum is a power-seeking behavior. When parents respond with a “power reprimand”, they add fuel to the fire and the tantrum escalates. When we lose our cool, physically try to stop the tantrum or spank the child, it proves to him that his tantrum is a great way to upset us, thus exerting his power. While he may not like the “power reprimand” response, it does serve his goal for seeking power – even if it’s negative power.

What should you do instead? Sign up for free access of Session 1 of Positive Parenting Solutions Online to learn the root cause of tantrums and how your personality may be fueling the fire!

You can eliminate tantrums, IF you know why they’re happening and what to do to correct them. We’ll teach you why they occur and arm you with the tools you need to tame tantrums for good. Click the button below to sign up for our free training.