The Difference Between Chores and Contributions

by Amy McCready

chores versus contributions

Do you know the difference between a chore and a family contribution? Your kids do.

Watch the video below and you’ll learn how to be a little more successful in getting your kids to do their chores.

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Full Transcript

I’m Amy McCready. Welcome to the Positive Parenting Solution of the Week in which I share a nugget of parenting wisdom to make your week go a bit more smoothly.

This week I want to talk about chores. Do you know the difference between a CHORE and a CONTRIBUTION?

It’s the difference it makes to someone else.

When your kids help out – even if it’s a little thing – be sure to let them know how much their contribution helped you.

You can say “Thank you for unloading the dishwasher, that’s a big job that I don’t have to do.” OR “You really helped our family tonight when you put all the groceries away.”

Let’s face it, kids aren’t going to love unloading the dishwasher or putting away the groceries, but knowing their efforts make a difference for YOU, turns that chore into a contribution and along with that will be fewer power struggles and more cooperating. That’s a win for everyone!

What do you say to let your kids know their contributions made a DIFFERENCE?

Tell us in the comments section under this video on our YouTube channel.

For more strategies to get kids complaining less and cooperating more go to www.positiveparentingsolutions.com

I’m Amy McCready. This has been a Positive Parenting Solution of the Week – join me again next week here at Ask Amy TV.

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About the Author
Amy McCready
Amy McCready is the Founder of Positive Parenting Solutions and the author of “If I Have To Tell You One More Time…The Revolutionary Program To Get Kids To Listen Without Nagging, Reminding, or Yelling”. (Penguin, 2011). She is a regular contributor on The TODAY Show and has also appeared on Rachael Ray, CNN, Fox & Friends, MSNBC, and elsewhere. As a “recovering yeller,” Amy is a champion of positive parenting techniques for happy families and well-behaved kids. Her award-winning online course empowers parents worldwide to correct their kids’ misbehaviors without nagging, reminding or yelling. Amy is a sought after keynote speaker and trusted spokesperson for family-friendly brands. In her most important role, she plays mom to two teenage boys. Follow Amy on Twitter. Connect with Amy.
Comments

{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }

Lynne

Thanks for sharing its really a big help. Sometimes it is really hard to talk to our kids when its about chores. It is really the way how we say it for them to feel that they help us a lot by doing simple things.

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Anonymous

Hahahahaa this is so not true its not even funny, unless your kids are completly selfless by the time they are teenager it wont matter what you call it they still wont want to do it.

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KATHERINE

This does work. I have been saying positive things, and using the word contribution, and also
they see me and their father sacrifice and work at a myriad things for the benefit of the family
I home school and run a small online business in the cracks, live on a farm, and we have started when the children were very, very young, giving them meaningful ways to cooperate and work together with the family in getting things done, it becomes a way of life, we all share in the work, the play, the rewards the chores are part of the fabric of life, and esteem in children is born from their accomplishing things, you only ever really know what you ” do” so let them do everything in small steps then in greater ones and they will surpass your wildest dreams.

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Amy McCready

So very true Katherine. Thanks so much for sharing. :-)

ABAM

This seems like a nice idea for asking for help but chores are a duty or job, a respondibility. They are non optional, this sounds like “Thank you for making my day easier” why is it making mom&dad’s day easier? Because if the chore isn’t done they will do it. I wouldn’t say anything that alludes to “I’ll do it if you won’t”. Maybe “I appreciate you doing your job today” or “When we all work together we are creating a home together”

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Laurie

As citizens of the household, there are things that every member has to do because it makes life run more smoothly for everyone. Chores, however, are not an option, and often times I will give a choice: would you like to unload the dishwasher or put away the groceries? That way they have some control over the work they do, but still realize that they are expected to help out. By the way, this works for getting the husband to help out too!!

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Amy McCready

Good to know, thanks Laurie for sharing!

Kate

My step kids only help out around our house, and give their mother a VERY difficult time about helping out around the house. One time I asked them why they hate helping their mother,but are so helpful here. They said that we have always expected for every member of the family to pitch in and are consistent with them about it. Whereas, their mother will nag but not keep up with keeping them accountable and never required them to pitch in as children. Though as now teens, they know better and should treat both homes with the same respect. They know they can get away with it. Consistency is key…and start early. My not yet two year old loves to clean and be my big girl helper. In fact, she insists on it…if she sees me cleaning or putting away dishes she wants to help.

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